For Fun

[emmitt01]

Q: How many Sooners does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A: Two. One to stand on the ladder...and the other to explain there is no electricity in Oklahoma.

[emmitt01]

Q: How do you get a one-armed Sooner out of a tree?

A: Wave to him.

[TheTastyGreek]

Q: How many Sooners does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A. They're not really feeling any hurry to solve the light bulb question. They're going to go through all their practices, evaluate all the bulbs in the box, and see what their options are. They may not even decide which light bulb to screw in until after the North Texas game. Frankly, Oklahoma has never really depended on electric light bulbs to be successful. The system they have doesn't need a particularly bright bulb. Last year, they didn't have a light bulb screwed in yet, and they still went on to win the Big 12 championship.

So to answer your question, screw Boise State. If anyone mentions that again, we're taking the website down.

[greenminer]

I thought all screwing at Oklahoma was done behind closed practices?

[GreenMachine]

I thought all screwing at Oklahoma was done behind closed practices?

actually its done in a sheep pen.

[EagleD]

Q. Why don't men in Oklahoma marry virgins?

A. 'Cause if she aint good enough for her daddy or her brothers, she aint good enough for him!

GO MEAN GREEN !!!!!!!!!!!!!

BEAT THE HELL OUT OF OU !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[EagleD]

Q. Why do Oklahoma license plates say "Oklahoma is OK"?

A. Because no one in the state can spell mediocre.

GO MEAN GREEN !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

BEAT THE HELL OUT OU !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Green Crazy]

How do you get a Sooner off your porch?

You pay for the pizza.

[drex]

Q: What is the Oklahoma University version of an ATM?

A: Any car dealership.

[emmitt01]

Q: How does a Sooner woman turn on the lights after sex?

A: She opens the car door.

[jperg2]

Oklahoma... the place where the sheep back up to a fence and say... da-a-a-a-a-a-a-dy!

Edited August 15, 2007 by jperg2

[Eagle1855]

Q: What does an Oklahoma graduate and a tornado have in common?

A. Both will end up in a trailer park.

[UNTflyer]

I thought all screwing at Oklahoma was done behind closed practices?

Wrong. All screwing in Oklahoma takes place behind closed barn doors.

[Eagle-96]

Q: What does the TGIF on a Sooners shoes stand for?

A: Toes Go In First

[LongJim]

Q: What do you call duct tape in Norman?

A: Chrome.

A little boy and his mother were walking in a Norman cemetary when they came

upon a headstone that read "Here lies an Oklahoma booster and an honest man."

The little boy asked, "Mommy, why did they bury 2 people in there?"

[LongJim]

A Sooner fan called the hospital saying "My wife is having a baby, what should I do?"

The nurse asked, "Is this her first baby?"

The Sooner fan replied, "No, this is her husband."

[LongJim]

Last week, severe thunderstorms and an F-5 tornado moved

through the Norman area. Damages were estimated at $5.00

[LongJim]

Q: How many Sooners does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A: Only one. But he gets money, a car, and three credit hours for it.

[LongJim]

An Oklahoma student was visiting a Yankee relative in Boston over the holidays. He went to a large party and met a pretty co-ed. He was attempting to start up a conversation with the tired line "Where do y'all go to school?"

The co-ed, of course, was not overly impressed with his grammar or southern drawl but did answer his question. "Yale," she replied.

The Sooner took a big deep breath and shouted,

"WHERE DO Y'ALL GO TO SCHOOL!?"

[pollock]

It's been said that California could slide off into the Pacific if there's a strong enough earthquake.

Texas will never slide off into the Gulf.

Because Oklahoma Sucks.

[gangrene]

Little David was in his 5th grade class when the teacher asked the children what their fathers did for a living. All the typical answers came up -- fireman, policeman, salesman, etc... David was being uncharacteristically quiet and so the teacher asked him about his father.

"My father's an exotic dancer in a gay cabaret and takes off all his clothes in front of other men. Sometimes, if the offer's really good, he'll go out to the alley with some guy and make love with him for money."

The teacher, obviously shaken by this statement, hurriedly set the other children to work on some coloring, and took Little David aside to ask him, "Is that really true about your father?"

"No," said David, "He coaches at the University of Oklahoma , but I was too embarrassed to say that in front of the other kids."

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How do you get an okie cheerleader into your room?

A: Grease her hips and throw in a twinkie.

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[gangrene]

Oklahoma Halloween costume-

[RETSO]

Q. What is the difference between an Okie and a large pizza?

A. A large pizza can feed a family of four!

Edited August 16, 2007 by RETSO

[Texas Stranger]

How do they separate the men from the boys in Oklahoma ?

With a garden hose.

[THE CLAW]

There was a Sooner fan who went hunting and ran across a beautiful, naked woman in the woods. He asked "Are y'all game?" She smiled seductively and nodded yes. So the Okie shot her.

Did you hear about the Sooner who was a dyslexic agnostic with insomnia?

He laid awake all night wondering if there really is a dog.