You must me a MUTS fan if....

[DeepGreen]

C'mon, some of you need to be really creative here!

The muts started a thread like this.

MUTS

[UNTLifer]

Poor attempts by the MUTS, but what would you expect.

MUTS Link

[UNTLifer]

You are envious of the restrooms at Fouts!

[LongJim]

...2 season tickets covers you, your wife, and your sister.

[LongJim]

...you receive your foodstamps and regularly mutter to yourself: "Dang. This ain't gonna leave Francine enuf to gits my 'baccer fer th week."

[FirefightnRick]

.........if, well I prefer to let the photos speak for themselves.

MUTS Wedding Cake

Rick

[Texas Stranger]

Your "alternate" mascot is even worse than an Albino Squirrel

apologize to those yet to go to lunch...had to do it.

[LongJim]

...your family tree had a possum in it.

...until Granny fried it last night for "supper".

[untgirl04]

.... if everyone at your class reunion is also there for your family reunion.

[FirefightnRick]

...if fewer than half your cars run.

Rick

[LongJim]

...the tooth fairy refuses to visit your trailer because of stress brought on by overwork.

[FirefightnRick]

.......if your house has more miles on it than your car does.

Rick

[MeanGreen61]

The "Sexy MUTS" poster boy

[LongJim]

...you're asked "Did your wife get collagen in her lips?" and you reply, "Naw, them's jest burns on account a her suckin' on the siphon hose afore I could start the tractor yestiddy ta go ta town."

Edited September 26, 2006 by LongJim

[MeanGreen61]

You run your gals thru a car was before the game

[LongJim]

MURFREESBORO PHILHARMONIC--LIVE!!

[LongJim]

THE MTSU CHANCELLOR AND MAYOR OF MURFREESBORO WELCOME YOU!

[letsgiveacheer]

You think "dressing for dinner" means shoes AND socks.

[LongJim]

A zombie went to a brain store to get some brain for dinner. He sees a sign remarking on the quality of the brain offered at this particular brain store.

So he asks the butcher, "How much for aSu brain?" "2 dollars an ounce." "How much for Troy State brain?" "3 dollars an ounce." "How much for SMU brain?" "4 dollars an ounce." "How much for MUTS brain?" "100 dollars an ounce."

"Why does it cost so much more for the MUTS brain??" exclaimed the zombie.

Butcher says: "Do you know how many MUTS grads it takes to get one ounce of brain?"

[DeepGreen]

You must be a MUTS fan if...

The Halloween pumpkin on your front porch has more teeth than your spouse.

[DeepGreen]

You must be a MUTS fan if....

You think that Dom Perignon is a Mafia leader.

[DeepGreen]

You must be a MUTS fan if ....

Your school fight song is "Dueling Banjos".

[Guest JohnDenver]

They write it themselves:

http://www.tennessean.com/local/archives/0...ent_ID=38279619

Stinky workers put on notice in Murfreesboro

Mayor of Simpleton

By MARGO RIVERS

Staff Writer

Policy requires good hygiene

Stinking is now a violation of Murfreesboro's city policy.

A city employee's persistent offensive body odor has prompted the City Council to mandate good hygiene, including a ban on using too much perfume or cologne.

After years of co-workers, his boss and Personnel Director Sherry Carpenter discussing the issue with the employee, city councilmen hoped the change was the last step in resolving the issue, city attorney Susan Emery McGannon said.

''The perception is that this was a reoccurring problem,'' McGannon said. ''There were short-term solutions, but it didn't work. When you have someone come to you and say that they were becoming nauseated, you have a problem.''

She refused to release the employee's name and the specifics of his job, saying she didn't want to embarrass him further.

Under the old city provision, employees were required to dress professionally, according to the person's job description. However, the amended policy reads:

''All employees shall maintain good hygiene and appropriate grooming while working. No employee shall have an odor generally offensive to others when reporting to work. An offensive body odor may result from a lack of good hygiene, from an excessive application of a fragrant aftershave or cologne, or from other causes.''

The policy does not replace the older provision or include odors stemming from medical conditions. Department heads would handle those kinds of cases under the federal Americans with Disabilities Act regulations, McGannon said.

Employees who violate the rule risk disciplinary actions ranging from reprimands to one-day suspensions, McGannon said.

Though co-workers have complained about the employee's aroma for years, city officials did not seriously consider amending the policy until a month ago. Still, McGannon said, this issue should have never gone this far.

''It's sad that this had to get legalistic,'' McGannon said. ''Things like this gives lawyers a bad rap when we have to make a rule for everything.''

Rutherford County does not have a specific policy on worker odors; however, County Executive Nancy Allen said she thinks the employee policy on appropriate dress is sufficient.

The county policy does not specifically mention personal hygiene, rather it is assumed that personal hygiene is included, she said.

Allen said she agreed with Murfreesboro's policy change if no other option was left. So far, Allen said, she hasn't had any reason to examine the issue.

''I've been in meetings in the community where someone had an odor due to too much perfume,'' Allen said. ''I usually made a joke about it. Some got it. Some didn't. But I haven't had anyone present this to me.''

Margo Rivers covers Rutherford County for The Tennessean. She can be reached at 259-8094 or mrivers@tennessean.com.

[LongJim]

...if you've ever won 1st place in an "Endurance Farting" contest.

[drex]

You might be a MUTS fan if your wife braided her armpits for her wedding day.