Diet Coke Boy

Eagle-96 · July 20, 2006

The question: Is Diet Coke Boy prone to injuries?

I think that we have alot to worry about relying on Freddy "Quick Pour" LaFlor this season. Freddy has had three wrist sprains, one jammed thumb, and two tennis elbows in the past year. He has missed all or part of 5 games the last two years. I, for one, and not going to depend on him getting the job done this year. I think it is high time that we start putting a serious effort into recruiting some top flight blue chip athletes to give us some drink depth. I mean, what if DD gets thirsty from calling his 8th draw before halftime and he turns to Freddy for a sip of ice cold refreshment and sees him sitting on the trainers table nursing a playstation cramp. Who's gonna quench DD's thirst for aspertame and caffeine. Do we want to rely on walkon Timmy "The Drinkerator" Franklin. He's got heart and all, but he's never served up carbonated beverages in D-1 yet. Should we turn to true freshman. Hank "No Spill" McGill? He may hold a few state records for ice distribution and spill conatinment but this aint high school anymore. I know LaFlor led the nation in pour to quarter ratio as a true freshman but he really disapointed last season and I blame it on his injuries. People, it's time to wake up.

tonyhuntoon · July 20, 2006

The Diet Coke boy does look a little silly.

eulesseagle · July 21, 2006

I nominate and would like to have the administration give serious consideration to:

1. He has speed.

2. His left arm will never wear out.

3. Only one problem is if he sqeezes too tight the coke will explode in your face.

Andrew Ross

By: Houlton Schools

Date: July 14, 2006

Houlton, Maine- Houlton, Maine running back Andrew Ross has signed a scholarship to play for the Mean Green of UNT as announced today.

Ross led the Caribous in his Sophmore, Junior and Senior years in rushing with a total of 5,874 yards.

According to Jim Larkins, his high school coach, Ross not only excelled in the classroom but was the team captain in his Senior year. The 2,645 yeards he gained last year is a state record. He also caught 12 passes for 215 yards and was 14 of 25 passing for 187 yards. Larkins said that Ross was not highly recruited after suffering one minor fracture to his right arm, in his Junior year, playing hockey against the Junior French National Team in Lyons, France.

Larkins said that Ross' size of 5'2" and 125 pounds was not encouraging for major colleges to recruit him because of possible durability and injury factors. Even though he runs the 40 in 4.1 and the 100 yards in 9.98 no colleges offered him any full full rides.

His class mates call him Speedy Gonzales.

After he gets the ball he is really hard to see and is compared to former Dallas Cowboy Tony Dorsett in his ability to cut in and out of trouble.

In his Freshman year he lost his left arm in a snowmobile accident. Ross' biometric left arm, according to Ross is 100% most of the time. One antidote that Ross tells is when they were playing a game in Lewiston (Maine), in his Junior year, he was carrying the ball in his left arm and the arm malfunctioned and the ball exploded and he was still able to carry a six inch piece of pigskin 55 yards for a touchdown. He has had to have his hand removed a couple of other times from linemen's face mask when the fingers jam, in the winter.

Andrew's great grandfather was one of the Munchkins in the Wizard of Oz and his sister has appeared on the Littlest Groom.

Ross is the tallest of his family at 5'2". His father and mother are both 4'9" and his sister is 4'7". Bill Ross, Andrew's father still holds the the record in Austrailia for being tossed 17' 9" in a dwarf toss in Melbourn in 1979.