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Posted (edited)

Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.

Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer

Chuck Norris once ate three 72 oz. steaks in one hour. He spent the first 45 minutes having sex with his waitress

Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his dad did.

Chuck Norris is 1/8th Cherokee. This has nothing to do with ancestry; the man ate an Indian.

Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life there.

But Bill Braskey gets my vote:

Bill Braskey once punched a hole through a cow...just so he could see who was coming up the road.

TO BILL BRASKEY.

Edited by greenminer
Posted

You are insane. Chuck Norris = genius fighter.

I  Watched some "Walker Texas Ranger" clips on Late Night with Conan O' Brian. Greatest show ever. period.

---Neither of those are in my top 100... I am still shaking my head over the NBC decision to use Conan as a replacemnt for Leno. I would just as soon watch "Conan the Barbarian" every night as watch "Conan the late night host" 10 min. I would think an intelligent 12 year old could come up with more clever routines and jokes than he has.

Posted

---Neither of those are in my top 100... I am still shaking my head over the NBC decision to use Conan as a replacemnt for Leno.    I would just as soon watch "Conan the Barbarian"  every night as watch "Conan the late night host"  10 min.  I would think an intelligent 12 year old  could come up with more clever routines and jokes than he has.

You sir are insane, Conan's style is uncanningly different from what late night has seen before. Jon Stewart will be replacing Letterman once he retires as well I betcha. It'll be tough to choose what to watch @ 10:30. (yeah 10:30, god I love the central time zone)

Posted

You sir are insane, Conan's style is uncanningly different from what late night has seen before. Jon Stewart will be replacing Letterman once he retires as well I betcha. It'll be tough to choose what to watch @ 10:30. (yeah 10:30, god I love the central time zone)

Old people hate Conan - its a scientific fact ph34r.gif

Posted

I heard that Conan's name used to be Conner Nathan O'Brien until he pissed off Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris round-house kicked him so hard it permanently fused his first and middle name together. This may also account for the shape of Conan's head!

Posted

"Did I ever tell you about the time Bill Brasky showed up at my daughter's wedding? You know my daughter, she's a beautiful girl. Well, Brasky shows up and you know he's a big fella. Well, he's standing right between me and my daughter at the ceremony. He's got no right to be there, but he's drunk and he's Brasky! Well, long story short: the priest accidentally marries me and Brasky! We spend the weekend in the Poconos — he loved me like I've never been loved before!"

"His poop is considered currency in Argentina!"

"Did I ever tell you about the time Bill Brasky forced me to wear a woman's bikini around the office? Brasky tears off my clothes and makes me wear this skimpy bikini. For the next three months I had to conduct my business wearing a woman's bathing suit. I would cry from shame and question my manhood daily. But at the end of the quarter, I'll be damned if my sales hadn't tripled."

"Brasky ranked 18th in the AP College Football Poll."

sorry, can't help myself!

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