Washington State QB Tyler Hilinski dead at 21

[Greenrex]

The family is asking for your prayers.

https://www.cbssports.com/college-football/news/washington-state-qb-tyler-hilinski-dead-at-21/
 

[FirefightnRick]

Smh.  Prayers for the family and team.

 

Rick

[BTG_Fan1]

Very sad, kid was highly rated and his younger brother of the 2019 class is being heavily recruited as well. 

[forevereagle]

18 minutes ago, BTG_Fan1 said:

Very sad, kid was highly rated and his younger brother of the 2019 class is being heavily recruited as well. 

Not sure if you meant it this way, but being worried about his rating and his brother's recruiting doesn't come off too well in this situation. It doesn't matter if he is a walk on or just a student who has never entered the stadium, this is a sad thing that happens all too often for too many people. Depression is a powerful foe that far too many don't think they can talk about or get help with. We need to remove the stigma with it so more people can get help and this can be avoided in the future.

[HoustonEagle]

The title of the article and them mentioning his stats just rub me the wrong way. 

[Hunter Green]

So tragic. The torture some people must go through to do something like this. So sad.

[MCMLXXX]

I Hope they check to see if he has a concussion history. He clearly had so much to live for. This is very sad.

[UNTLifer]

7 minutes ago, MCMLXXX said:

I Hope they check to see if he has a concussion history. He clearly had so much to live for. This is very sad.

http://theconversation.com/concussions-and-cte-more-complicated-than-even-the-experts-know-81794

There are a lot of gaps in the science behind your line of thinking.

Very sad.  Prayers with the family.

[Harry]

My thoughts go out to his family and friends/teammates.  Such a tragedy.

The saddest thing is that people will make nice thoughtful and sincere statements, and post the suicide hotline number etc but in reality it will be swept under the rug in a couple of days.  Not enough is done to try to keep this from happening.  We go back to the grind and system of expectations that not every member of our society is wired to deal with.   In the same regard, we as a society are not wired with how to deal with the aftermath of suicide. 

This kid had the world at his fingertips and something shifted.  Doctors say it is a medical issue, that cells can no longer process as they should and the pain becomes unbearable.  Yet it is still labeled as a selfish way to go out and there is a stigma left behind.

I am realistic that this phenomenon will never go away, it's been around for centuries,  but I wish that our society would place more emphasis on mental health and treatment.  I think our proliferation of subscribing meds to solve problems is a big issue here.   I wish we could teach more about the warning signs and provide people with tangible ways to prevent this from happening.  We will never eradicate it completely, but we could certainly try to make an impact and lower the amount of suicides in the future.

 

[MCMLXXX]

29 minutes ago, UNTLifer said:

http://theconversation.com/concussions-and-cte-more-complicated-than-even-the-experts-know-81794

There are a lot of gaps in the science behind your line of thinking.

Very sad.  Prayers with the family.

I really don't want to engage in some prolonged discussion on this so I this will be my last post on this matter. The information is relevant and beneficial to further research. As a parent I would I would want to know. Finally I don't know you or your professional background or experience, so none of this is intended to be personal, but let me note that I have in my profession been required to make decisions on the impact of concussions on individual conduct and I am not throwing wild speculation out there.

 

 

[LongJim]

3 hours ago, BTG_Fan1 said:

Very sad, kid was highly rated and his younger brother of the 2019 class is being heavily recruited as well. 

There's a time and a place.

[UNTLifer]

1 hour ago, MCMLXXX said:

I really don't want to engage in some prolonged discussion on this so I this will be my last post on this matter. The information is relevant and beneficial to further research. As a parent I would I would want to know. Finally I don't know you or your professional background or experience, so none of this is intended to be personal, but let me note that I have in my profession been required to make decisions on the impact of concussions on individual conduct and I am not throwing wild speculation out there.

 

 

Oh, I agree with what you are saying and respect the position  you are in regarding making those decisions.  I work closely with sports medicine and also realize that the current studies are lacking.  There needs to be more and better research.

[Wag Tag]

23 hours ago, Harry said:

My thoughts go out to his family and friends/teammates.  Such a tragedy.

The saddest thing is that people will make nice thoughtful and sincere statements, and post the suicide hotline number etc but in reality it will be swept under the rug in a couple of days.  Not enough is done to try to keep this from happening.  We go back to the grind and system of expectations that not every member of our society is wired to deal with.   In the same regard, we as a society are not wired with how to deal with the aftermath of suicide. 

This kid had the world at his fingertips and something shifted.  Doctors say it is a medical issue, that cells can no longer process as they should and the pain becomes unbearable.  Yet it is still labeled as a selfish way to go out and there is a stigma left behind.

I am realistic that this phenomenon will never go away, it's been around for centuries,  but I wish that our society would place more emphasis on mental health and treatment.  I think our proliferation of subscribing meds to solve problems is a big issue here.   I wish we could teach more about the warning signs and provide people with tangible ways to prevent this from happening.  We will never eradicate it completely, but we could certainly try to make an impact and lower the amount of suicides in the future.

 

Nice write up. Unfortunately it is about the $ and the large section of the population is really, really getting screwed are the Veterans. Always read about doctors and the pill mills. This biggest pill mill is the VA.

[Harry]

36 minutes ago, Wag Tag said:

Nice write up. Unfortunately it is about the $ and the large section of the population is really, really getting screwed are the Veterans. Always read about doctors and the pill mills. This biggest pill mill is the VA.

You are absolutely right about the Vets.  I will say that they are making some improvements there lately which is encouraging -- but still a very long way to go.

[SteaminWillieBeamin]

20 hours ago, Wag Tag said:

Nice write up. Unfortunately it is about the $ and the large section of the population is really, really getting screwed are the Veterans. Always read about doctors and the pill mills. This biggest pill mill is the VA.

That isn't anything Harry was talking about. Not about pain meds or pill mills or the VA. 

He was talking about the stigma of depression and the societal shame of having/dealing with it. Our dear friend's 24 year old son shot his head off this summer. From the outside, this young man didn't seem to be suffering from depression. He seemed a bit lost in figuring out adulthood, making choices *I* wouldn't make, but was ultimately pointing in the right general direction for making it... Then he took his easily accessed gun and took his crown off right in front of his girlfriend. 

Why? No idea. An argument with his girlfriend was just enough to push him over the edge I suppose. I wish he didn't have some easy access to a gun, since impulse control is the largest factor in young men suicides. If they wake up in the morning, they have chance to correct their thinking and deal with it. 

Yet as a society, we don't treat depression correctly. We shame people who have it. Think they are weak. Think they are childish - selfish. 

We even treat it the family of the suicide that way, like *they* had some weakness that caused this. So then everyone buries the lead on what happened and how the death really occurred. "It was an accident." "He was sick for a long time." "Undiagnosed illness." "Gun accident while cleaning his gun." "Hunting accident." Whatever lie it takes to keep the society moving without recognizing the real illness - depression 

It just so sad. 

[Cerebus]

 

[SteaminWillieBeamin]

Here is a more controversial take on the topic. I know prayers are always offered and sometimes it is snidely cast aside in jest... like prayers are helping the suicide rate. I realize and recognize the intentions of saying "prayers to the family..." or whatever. It is a good sentiment and like all other terrible stuff that occurs in this world, offering prayers allows us to continue on our way. I also know that prayer by the impacted family can offer a lot of comfort too. That is all genuine and good.

I think other little things can make a difference (besides prayer). Let's start with our language and how we talk about suicide. 

Up until 1963 there were six states that considered it a crime to commit suicide. Criminal. That meant your loved one, dearly departed, was a criminal in death... forever.  Criminals are right at the top of who does not get sympathy in this society. Fortunately, it isn't a crime anywhere in the US anymore. Yet our language has not changed how we talk about it. We say "committed suicide."  The top definition for commit is "carry out or perpetrate (a mistake, crime, or immoral act)."  

I am not religious (shocking, I know). I don't find suicide immoral nor criminal. I find it incredibly wasteful and sad. I can see how a religious person would find it immoral and in direct opposition to their canon. Even with that, can we stop referring to it as "committing suicide?" Call it death by suicide... or succumbed to depression.. or a dozen other ways to say that someone died by their own hands? I think it would help remove some stigma off the family and off the immediate character assassination of the dead. It seems silly. I know. Yet I know families that still won't talk about it because their are so embarrassed.... like the dead is a felon. Like their delinquent dad jailbird who never gets mentioned at Christmas. 

Anyhow, words matter. Language is important. Call me a snowflake -- I do not care. But give it some thought. 

Here's my anecdote:  I have had to stop and think about hand gestures I do to tell a person that I would rather die than do something... I no longer point my fingers to my temple and playfully pull the trigger.. or say "that's a ender for me." It had become just a part of normal jovial banter that I never gave it thought - ever. I unintentionally did it in front of a family that had a child die by suicide ways back and we were talking about where to go eat.... and man... I can tell you.. words matter. Gestures matter. Trivializing|criminalizing something that touches almost every family is serious business. I felt terrible. They didn't make me feel terrible, but I could feel the air suck out of the room. 

 

 

Edited January 19, 2018 by SteaminWillieBeamin

[Rudy]

On 1/17/2018 at 11:56 AM, Hunter Green said:

So tragic. The torture some people must go through to do something like this. So sad.

Yep. There is a lack of funding, resources, and trained individuals to deal with mental health issues. It has come a long way in the past few years, but it still has a long ways to go. Too many people fail to recognize the signs of someone with a mental health issue. And sadly, some people are too wrapped up in themselves to notice or even care that someone they know has a problem. And then, when people do recognize that a friend or loved one needs help, they lack the patience or training to properly care for someone who is dealing with a mental health crisis. That's when they pawn it off on others instead of helping them get the help they need.