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It is november and the wheather is getting colder, the wind is getting stronger. So maybe you are feeling a bit under the weather, maybe you and your favourite football team have cought a cold, maybe your sinuses are full of mucus, and you find breathing difficult. What to do? We have the solution for you! The University of North texas presents: THE MEAN GREEN DEFENSE, (now using a heavily improved formula) We guarantee that this physically applied treatment will knock the snot right out of you and your football team! You should consult your physician or other health care professional before starting this or any other treatment to determine if it is right for your needs. Common side effects include but are not limited to: bruises, hallucinations (you'll see this defense do things that you know should be impossible), impotence (the university has received repeated complaints by customers that they experienced a "inabilty to score"), panic attacks, and body dysmorphic disorder (fthe football players on your team may experience unhappyness with their bodily form after the treatment), and generally a creative rearangement of your players anoatomies. . It may take up to 30 Minutes for the treatment to take full effect. This treatment is most effective when applied at the practicians office. Adress: Apogee Stadium, Denton, Tx.
