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Kathryn Henderson named 11th ugliest college graduate by GMG.com


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11. Kathryn Henderson

Location: Various shitty websites across the internet

Year Built: 1986 (estimated)

Key Architects: Some woman of questionable judgment and virtue, some drunk and/or stupid bastard without the common sense to wear a condom

This rapidly decaying late 1900's structure illustrates the worst excesses of the period. The primary edifice is drab, with a shiny exterior that emphasizes the droopy, puffy flaws inherent in the structural design. Deep fissures in the exterior reveal a poor foundation, and the inevitable dilapidation they betray evokes a sense of despair in the viewer.

The east wing is marred by graffiti, exacerbating the hideousness of the chalky, pasty primary exterior color. This revolting palette is worsened by the flat, dingy canopy draped over the entire structure. Matted, begrimed, poorly landscaped and maintained... The overgrowth cries out for topiary care under an experienced hand.

Odd, sweeping, primarily cosmetic buttresses seem as though intended to minimize the bizarrely proportioned gap between metopion and ophyron, but fail miserably at the task. Taken entire, the lineament is off-putting and has little, if any, redeeming value.

VERDICT: A sad, almost comical abomination. Not uniquely revolting enough to stand out as exceptional... Mired primarily in a general, bland hideousness endemic to the region and period of assembly.


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TheTastyGreek

Posted

Before anyone asks... About 15 minutes, most of which was spent looking for photos and making sure the tone and phrasing matched other entries from the article that inspired it.

All About UNT

Posted

"You can find Kathryn lost in the back of a library, researching things no one else cares about, pontificating about that Danish Modernist chair at the flea market or noting the current trends in street fashion around NYC. Currently she resides in Brooklyn, NY with her two cats and (almost) too many friends."

hahahhahaha what an egotistical piece she is lol.

TheTastyGreek

Posted

"You can find Kathryn lost in the back of a library, researching things no one else cares about, pontificating about that Danish Modernist chair at the flea market or noting the current trends in street fashion around NYC. Currently she resides in Brooklyn, NY with her two cats and (almost) too many friends."

hahahhahaha what an egotistical piece she is lol.

Two cats is how it starts. As the property values continue to fall, the entire neighborhood will inevitably be overrun with dozens more.

It's like the "broken windows" school of sociology/criminology. The same principle applies to Harlequin romance novels.

TheFranchise

Posted

12370939280477422264.jpeg
4bfqtwrhbw5xrbe7.jpg
11. Kathryn Henderson

Location: Various shitty websites across the internet

Year Built: 1986 (estimated)

Key Architects: Some woman of questionable judgment and virtue, some drunk and/or stupid bastard without the common sense to wear a condom

This rapidly decaying late 1900's structure illustrates the worst excesses of the period. The primary edifice is drab, with a shiny exterior that emphasizes the droopy, puffy flaws inherent in the structural design. Deep fissures in the exterior reveal a poor foundation, and the inevitable dilapidation they betray evokes a sense of despair in the viewer.

The east wing is marred by graffiti, exacerbating the hideousness of the chalky, pasty primary exterior color. This revolting palette is worsened by the flat, dingy canopy draped over the entire structure. Matted, begrimed, poorly landscaped and maintained... The overgrowth cries out for topiary care under an experienced hand.

Odd, sweeping, primarily cosmetic buttresses seem as though intended to minimize the bizarrely proportioned gap between metopion and ophyron, but fail miserably at the task. Taken entire, the lineament is off-putting and has little, if any, redeeming value.

VERDICT: A sad, almost comical abomination. Not uniquely revolting enough to stand out as exceptional... Mired primarily in a general, bland hideousness endemic to the region and period of assembly.

This post has been promoted to an article

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Couldn't help it . . . we screened "Citizen Kane" last week in film class.

  • Upvote 1
LongJim

Posted

If you're going to write a piece solely designed to drive mouse clicks and revenue, at least have the decency to not do it by essentially crapping on an innocent party or parties. Otherwise, you're just a sorry sack.

  • Upvote 2
UNT Five&Dime

Posted

Before anyone asks... About 15 minutes, most of which was spent looking for photos and making sure the tone and phrasing matched other entries from the article that inspired it.

I wouldn't have spent 15 minutes on this twit...

  • Upvote 1
meangreener

Posted

I'd give her the brown bag special.[/quote

Why can't you be more reasonable like this on a daily basis?

  • Upvote 2
Graddean

Posted

Good for 3 graduate hours of creative writing, 3 hours of analytical thinking, and 3 hours of architectural analysis.

eulessismore

Posted

Sadly, I would. I totally would.

Guys, you're so.....much..... better than this. Just stop it, PLEASE!

All About UNT

Posted

Maybe she got the 400 from doing the brown bag special with cougarking?

And spend 4 yrs allowance on her?

oldguystudent

Posted

Guys, you're so.....much..... better than this. Just stop it, PLEASE!

Nah, you severely overestimate me.

Really, I meant that as a self deprecating remark mocking the crippling loneliness I've lived over the past several years, rendering me without any filters or standards whatsoever. If it breathes, has a pulse, and fewer than two dozen prison tattoos, I'll date it.

  • Upvote 5



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